Lord Of The Harrisites
by WhiteCastleBurgers
Summary: The lotr characters have invaded Ruby and Roberta's school O PG-13 for language
1. Band 0 Band Practice

Lord Of The Harrisites

OK our title needs some explanation. **Harrisites** are what students from our high school are called. Since we're putting Lord of The Rings characters into out school, we thought that **Lord of the Harrisites** was an apt title. This isn't your average "Hey, I think I'll put the Lord of the Rings characters into my life today," fic. Our school is funny as it is, and with the Fellowship and their various friends (and foes), it's bound to be hilarious.

**ALL NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT  (namely, us)**

Disclaimer: We don't own LoTR, don't sue… Please?

Chapter 1: Beginnings and Band-mates 

            It was a dreary morning in New York City. Ruby and Roberta (known as: Bobette) walked to lovely Townsend Harris High. "Another early morning of playing the lovely trumpet. I can't wait to get inside," Ruby said, her voice laced with sarcasm. "I know, one 'Uhh, you guys aren't doing all that well in my class' speech from Mr. Tromtig, coming up," Bobette said, equally upset that she had to come to school early to play that god-forsaken horn. 

            Ruby and Roberta then entered their quiet little school when out of no where "PROGRAM CARD PROGRAM CARDS NOW!!!" yelled the fat bald security guards of THHS. "W-wait!! Let us get them please!" Roberta pleaded. "TOO LATE!!!" they screamed as they began to brutally beat Roberta and Ruby over the heads with their water guns.

            Well, soon after they started to limp down the hall, Ruby and Roberta reached the music room. "Respect. REPRESENT," said their friend Byctoria as she walked down the hall carrying her tuba. When Ruby and Roberta finally took their seats at the back of the class, they didn't play their horns, but rather stared at the back of Eric-otic's head. Eric-otic is the resident hot, saxophone playing, senior at Townsend. In Roberta's eyes. Roberta turned her head to the Daewoo computer screen and said "Are you ready for a LoTR cameo!?"

            As Ruby was tuning her horn she spotted something hobbit-like. Without a doubt it was Frodo: tap dancing while he blew on his ring (which remarkably sounded like a harmonica) "Are you a Baggins?" Ruby asked slowly.  "Yes Frodo is my name and playing the ring is my game!"

            At this point, Eric-otic had taken notice of the odd visitor. Frodo and Eric-otic locked eyes. "Hey, we look alike," Eric-otic said. They then proceeded to touch each others faces like weird monkeys on crack, and then they finally had a breakthrough. "MY LONG LOST BROTHER ERICO BAGGINS!" "I've been wanting to show these for a long time, brother," Eric-otic (or Erico, whichever floats your boat) then took off his shows revealing… HAIRY FEET!!!! "Let's cry, hug, and dance around like idiots!" And that they did. 

            Then as they frolicked away through the flowers together, the ex-trumpet playing bells player, Louisiana said. "I DID IT I MASTERED THE A NOTE!" he was so excited that he actually tripped over the bell set and knocked himself unconscious. "Respect and represent my brother," Byctoria wailed. "Well, uhh, that's about all for now class. I'll, uhh, let ya go now," said Mr. Tromtig. Ruby and Roberta each flipped the bird at his retreating and  non-matching back. 

            "Well, I'm off to chem.," said Roberta, "and you're off to bio, fun, fun, fun" "Yes I cant wait for more of MizzXEatXThem." Roberta looked puzzled for a moment. "Ruby?" Ruby cast a glance over her shoulder at Roberta, "Yeah Bobette?" "How did Frodo get into our school? And doesn't MizzXEatXThem sound kind of orc-ish to you?"

Ruby pondered for a moment, "I don't know, but I hope he brought Legolas with him. But, now that I think about it, MizzXEatXThem _does_ sound orc-ish. You don't think…" They locked eyes and mentally sang the doom song, before they ran off screaming and waving their hands.

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	2. Band 1 Bio with and Orc and a hero steal...

Lord of The Harrisites 

Chapter 2 (Part 1): Band 1 Bio

Soon Ruby ventured away from her fellow lord of the rings fanatic, Roberta, to the dreadful biology class O_O **dun dun dun**

As Ruby motioned to twist the doorknob an ear-piercing shriek came from the other end as no one other than Lord Elrond came out!

"The evil teacher!!! NO I DO NOT WISH TO KNOW THE FUNCTIONS OF A CELL MEMBRANE!!! AHH!!" he screamed as he ran down the hall running over a poor space monkey known as 'bush'.

Ruby shrugged it off and entered her classroom otherwise.

She sat down in a seat and decided to talk to her friend Heatherina

"Something seems strange today." Ruby said.

"I know!" exclaimed Heatherina "For one Jamesest DIDN'T shoot Richardira and two…"

"No, I mean don't some of the people roaming around the school seem kind of erm- odd to you?" 

Heatherina blinked as Ruby retreated to her seat next to her friend Noelia-

"Wait!" Ruby said, "You're not Noelia!"

"No don't think so I am a hobbit, shire folk." Answered the familiar voice of Meriadoc Brandybuck.

Before she could enter however MizzXEatXThem came in, loudly chewing gum.  

"So todai clazz we have a neu stoudent Merryadick Brandybuk$"

"It's Merry." Merry corrected

"Ya ya whateva whateva." Merry stared at her with sad hobbit eyes as the …take it gollum (gollum: nasssssssstyyyy teachers precious) continued with the pointless lesson. "Yea so we gonna talk bout enzymes and how dey make each oda happii and…uhh lyk im blonde and uhh…aw fuck it im eating dat hobbit yo."

Everyone screamed as MizzXEatXThem transformed into an orc upon their very mists and sprinted toward Brandybuk$ while he shrieked like the tiny hobbit lad he is.

But right as the evil MizzXEatXThem was about to sink her sharp teeth into Merry's foot Boromir came crashing through the doors screaming like a fucking lunatic and throwing himself on MizzXEatXThem, fortunately knocking her through the window.

Boromir stood there, broad smile upon his ugly ugly face when he was enticed by a pack of extra bubble dubble gum. He chewed it, then choaked, then died.

Merry cried out loud and Pippin who at the time was being chased by a security guard stopped and looked in the bio classroom "Well would ya look at that." And continued running (apparently he had eaten the security guards hero)

Nealia and Nate who sat behind Ruby and Merry were quite shocked from the event but found it a good time to cut class, as did the rest of the biology classroom. Merry ran out of the room screaming something about ringwraiths coming soon. Ruby was very disappointed because she didn't have a proper chat with merry and proceeded to gym.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Authors' Notes: Well you guys, we hope you're enjoying it so far! _Chapter 2 (Part 2): Band 1 Chem _should be up straight away!


	3. Band 1 Chem with A Smelly Ranger and Pyr...

Lord of The Harrisites

Chapter 2 (Part 2): Band 1 Chem

            After leaving Ruby, Roberta trudged into her chem lab, which as always smelled kind of off. She was all ready to take her morning nap (as she always did in band 1), when she noticed that is wasn't Lonetta who she was sitting next to, but rather Aragorn son of Arathorn! Well, Roberta was still quite shocked from her meeting with Frodo, so she turned to him and said, "Aren't you Aragorn? Son of Arathorn?" Aragorn grabbed Roberta's arm and whispered in that cool 'I'm and elf even though I'm really not' way that he has, "nobody must know! You must call me, uh, uh, uh, Aragornabelle!" Roberta was kind of startled, and she proceeded to stare at Aragorn, oops, ahem ahem, _Aragornabelle_, like he had 12 heads.

            Just then Mr. Molzel walked into lab, and he began to explain the lab. Then he noticed his new student. "Hey, do you wanna hear a _mole_ joke?!" Aragornabelle looked so scandalized, he made this face: = O "Rangers don't listen to jokes about inferior creatures!" It was now Mr. Molzel's turn to look like this: = O "MARVIN THE MOLE IS NOT AN INFERIOR CREATURE AHHHH!!!" And he and Aragornabelle began to have a Matrix-style fight. Eventually, Roberta broke them up, and the class started their lab. 

            "Okay, now you just dangle the magnesium ribbon over the Bunsen burner," Roberta said, reading the lab instructions to her and Aragornabelle's lab partner, Andreaw. Andreaw's eyes lit up with that sick pyro-manic glow, and she threw the magnesium ribbon into the Bunsen burner! Red flames started shooting up from the Bunsen burner, and Andreaw and Aragornabelle watched on in amazement, while Roberta looked like this: = O "You guys can't do that, you're gonna blow up the whole fucking lab!" Upon hearing that, Boromir flew in through the window on a jungle vine screaming like a fucking lunatic. He jumped on the Bunsen burner, and the red flames stopped. But Mr. Molzel had been brewing a secret plan against Aragornabelle the whole band, and he decided to go execute it.

            Thinking that Boromir was Aragornabelle, Mr. Molzel smacked him over the head with Marvin the mole (okay, okay, so there was a brick inside the mole), and Boromir fell out of the window and died. Pippin stopped his running (now he was being threatened with a referral for not wearing shoes) from the security guards, and said, "Well, would ya look at that," then he continued to run. The end of band music started to play, and Roberta walked around the fighting Mr. Molzel and Aragornabelle to proceed to Spanish.

End Chapter 2 

Authors' Notes: Well, _Chapter 3 (Part 1): Band 2 Gym _should be up with speed, followed by _Chapter 3 (Part 2): Band 2 Spanish._


End file.
